The flight from hell. Are we THOSE people?
It finally happened. Remember when we told you that Baby B was great on airplanes? That he barely made a fuss on a 10 hour flight from Vancouver to Frankfurt last summer (pictured above)? That he was a pleasure to fly with on the first 10 flights of his young life?
This was before he learned to walk and demanded his own space.
We learned this lesson the hard way on our flight from Vancouver to Toronto last month.
The primary purpose of visiting Toronto was to attend TBEX 2013 (Travel Blog Exchange), the world’s largest gathering of travel bloggers and industry professionals. And yes, we even bring our baby boy to travel conferences – it’s one of the ways we balance work, travel and family.
Normally when we book flights we select a window and an aisle seat.
When we arrive at the airport, we inform the airline agent that we are traveling with an infant and they typically try their best to block off the middle seat, provided the flight is not full.
This trick has worked many times in the past, meaning we’ve often had an empty seat for Baby B. That is, until we decided to take one of the most popular flights in Canada – Vancouver to Toronto.
Needless to say, we didn’t get the middle seat blocked off for us. In fact, the airline had changed planes and reassigned seating. They made the assumption that we were traveling together (a fair assumption) and assigned us a middle and window seat. Not a good idea with a restless toddler.
Fortunately they were able to give us the middle and aisle seats, allowing Baby B to roam up and down the aisle.
When do you start buying a separate seat for your toddler?
That’s the question we struggled with. Apparently we waited one flight too long.
Here’s the thing. Baby B isn’t a baby any more. He’s a curious, not-so-little toddler that loves to run around and hates being confined to small spaces.
Picture this – cramped economy seating with a squirmy toddler sitting on our lap, his legs pressed against the tray table and his hands pushing the entertainment system. The poor woman sitting in front of us didn’t have a chance.
He kicked.
He pushed.
He screamed.
He threw tantrums.
Yay, this is fun!
But we brought our trusty iPad, loaded with the Giggle Bellies app (his favourite at the time), so it distracted him for a little while.
However, in order for him to get optimal viewing pleasure, he kept pushing Cam out of his seat. He wanted space. He wanted the seat all to himself.
So, this meant that Cam had to stand in the aisle. Awesome.
Enter the turbulence.
About 30 minutes into the flight we experienced some minor turbulence. Nothing crazy, but the captain put the seat belt sign on, which meant Cam had to return to his seat. Not if Baby B has anything to say about it!
He freaked out. The kind of freak out that every parent dreads.
It finally happened – we became THOSE passengers.
Our temporary solution – Nicole crouched on the floor in the middle seat and gave Baby B the seat so he could continue playing with the iPad. Success!
That is, until the flight attendant busted us.
“I’m sorry mam, but you need to buckle up and hold your child”, she said.
Doh! He wasn’t having any of it. The turbulence continued for another 30 minutes. But even when it stopped, the pilot left the seat belt sign on. Why won’t the pilot just turn off the damn seat belt sign?!
Baby B’s crankiness continued. We managed to cool him down with snacks and books, but this only lasted about 30 minutes. We still had 2 hours to go!
Finally the captain turned off the seat belt sign, so Cam gave up his seat again and stood in the aisle. He remained in the aisle for over an hour! The flight attendants were not impressed and gave him the evil eye each time they had to maneuver around him.
It was uncomfortable.
We try to look on the bright side of things. Having the ability to travel is a gift, one that we are very thankful for. But sometimes it just sucks. This was one of those times.
When we arrived in Toronto we jumped online and booked a third seat for the flight home. We didn’t want to experience that again. Surprisingly, the flight home was one of his best yet. He slept, he laughed, he snacked, he watched cartoons. It was the complete opposite. Turns out he just needed his own seat.
The lesson learned?
At 18 months old, it was time to purchase Baby B his own seat.
But we haven’t learned our lesson. No, that would be too easy. We are traveling to Los Angeles in a couple days and had already purchased our seats before this experience, which means we will be attempting the two seat gamble one last time.
Wish us luck!
~~~~~~~~
Do you travel with your children?
Have you experienced the flight from hell?
I always thought traveling with kids would be sort of easy (this is how you can tell I don’t have kids) and that kids will sort of adapt your way of thinking. Turns out I’m super wrong. Did you fly anymore after this ordeal?
Traveling with kids is easy, and they typically do adapt to their surroundings. But there’s a period (between 1.5 to 3 years old) when they are difficult to fly with. They have not yet developed the skills to effectively control their emotions, and they don’t quite understand the cause and effect of their actions. Aside from the flight, the rest of the trip was great. It’s a small price to pay.
This experience happened a few weeks ago, so we haven’t tested it again. But we will in a couple days… so we’ll let you know!
We will continue to fly with him, a little crying is not going to have us completely change our lifestyle.
Sorry about your experience. Glad it was better on the way back.
What’s your thinking/experience on bringing the car seat on the plane? We’re flying 5h with a 16M old toddler and we think she’ll sleep better if we can restrain her in the car seat. For the rest of the flight, it would be better to not have the car seat so she has her own seat. Any thoughts?
If you bring your car seat you will need to purchase a seat for your baby (you can’t have it on your lap). If the baby is under 2 years old and has its own seat, airlines typically require you to bring the car seat anyways. So that makes your decision easy!
But make sure your car seat is airline approved. There should be a label on the car seat. If you’re unsure, call ahead and confirm.
We have definitely been in your shoes! Our worst was on the way home to Seattle from Kauai when our son was about 15 months. Glad you were able to purchase a seat for him on the way home–space definitely helps, as we’ve learned when we were lucky enough to score an extra seat (we try to the window-aisle booking trick too!)
We’ve got one last flight this weekend, then we will be purchasing him a seat for every flight. He’s almost 2 anyways, so we won’t really have a choice!
Oh I feel for you…its bad enough being with a cranky toddler in a supermarket but on board a plane when everyone wants to give you evil looks is the worst! I’ve mostly traveled solo with my kids and I envy you having both parents available for him and each others moral support. Good luck on the next flight…I hope it is not a busy one.
Traveling solo must be very difficult. We’ve only had to do it a couple times and its when Baby B was younger. The flight would have been a lot worse if it was only one of us.
Hahahaha! I know it’s bad but this made me laugh! Imagine being the lady in the seat in front of you!!!! So very glad that I only ever flew with my kids when they were older – like TEENAGERS!!! Fingers crossed that last flight is not too awful for you….
Quick update — Both flights to and from Los Angeles were much better (he slept for almost the entire flight home!). He seems to have gotten over his frustrations with not having seat – disaster averted!
Tracey: “Hahahaha! I know it’s bad but this made me laugh! Imagine being the lady in the seat in front of you!!!! ”
Glad you think it’s funny. If you were the person in the seat in front, you’d be (rightly) filled with annoyance, and probably rage at the incessant fussing, noise, screaming, kicking, poking, crying, and generally demanding behavior of the toddler behind you. Not to mention the adults, whose catering to their kid’s whims meant interfering with the flight attendants’ ability to perform their work on behalf of the other passengers, by violating safety rules and blocking the aisles.
As for the authors, please consider that while you are “balancing work, travel, and family,” you are negatively affecting both the work and the travel of most of those around you. Sort of selfish in our opinion.
Perhaps you should buy your own private jet
so you won’t be so annoyed by a toddler
which maybe you were never one yourself
Proud Grandma
Arrival N. Crosscheck I’ve have definitely been that person in the front seat – many times. I’ve also sat being a hugely overweight man who actually threw himself into his seat every time he returned from the bathroom – hitting my in the face with his chair on two occasions! I’ve had kids vomit in the seat next to me while we were landing so they couldn’t go to the bathroom – while their poor parents tried to help them as best they could. I’ve had adults with bad breath sleep on my shoulder for an hour or two and one guy freak out and insist he had to open the exit door and get off the plane. And plenty of times I’ve watched adults block the aisles while they socialised for hours on end with a friend or three in another row. It’s an aeroplane. You’re in a confined space for a long period of time with people you wouldn’t normally hang out with. Suck it up! It’s not your entire holiday or business trip. It’s a tiny part of your life – why not take it with good humour? What have you REALLY got to lose?
Don’t waste your time on this one Tracey. I just checked out this person’s blog and he (or she?) seriously thinks he’s better than others because he’s a frequent flier – like that actually carries some sort of weight. It’s quite comical, and sad really.
I KNOW!!!! Imagine having bare feet IN PUBLIC!!!! The horror!
Actually, the woman in front of us was quite understanding. She has kids and knows how frustrating air travel with a toddler can be. And she, like most modern parents, has had to endure an uncomfortable flight to transport her kids from point A to point B.
Clearly you don’t have kids – and it sounds like that is a very good thing. It’s ironic that you use the word “selfish” in your comment. The world does not revolve around you – perhaps you are the one that needs an attitude change? Heaven forbid you have to coexist with the next generation that will care for you in your old age. Selfish indeed!
You guys are our heroes! It is important to take kids to see the world.
Thanks guys! We agree. The greatest gift we can give our children is an appreciation for life, and travel plays a big role in that!
These are the things that make me dread traveling with children. In my mind I’m well aware that it will happen to everyone. There is no getting around it, it’s just going to happen if you travel with a child, but it is like my worst nightmare. Seems like you made the best of it, but I’m not looking forward to this at all.
Most people are empathetic and understand that babies and children are uncomfortable on planes. Having kids certainly changes things – you are no longer invisible and it becomes less about you and more about them.
Sure, you will get the occasional evil eye from some people, and you will have the odd person that can’t stand children in general (can’t do much about that!), but you can’t please everyone no matter how hard you try. These people will find anything to bitch about, so you’ll never win that battle. You just do your best and try to take each moment in stride.
Flying on planes is such an insignificant part of any trip, so don’t let it ruin your love of travel!
Aw man, I really wish I hadn’t read this a few days before flying 14 hrs from London to Singapore with a 21 monther. She hasn’t got a seat and I know she’ll go nuts without one, but flight is now full so can’t get one either. When I booked the flight six months ago she was a delicate, scared little thing, now she’s turned all fiesty and independent.
What’s better is we couldn’t get seats together with my 3 year old and Aunty, who is going to travel all the way to Australia just to help us out and fly back to the UK again, so there will be complete strangers beside me. Joy!
I figure if I aim for the flight being disastrous, then anything better is a massive plus. Wish me luck!
ps. hope your next flight goes well 🙂
Good luck! Remember to just take a deep breath when things get frustrating. And ask the airline agents at the airport to put you near the back of the plane… that way you’ll impact less people. 🙂
Yes, I’m one of THOSE people who typically gets annoyed with the screaming child, but only when it seems the parent doesn’t care (which many don’t). If I saw the parents struggling and trying to calm the child like you did, I would only feel sympathy for both of you and not annoyance!
That’s totally understandable, and fair. I think the same attitude applies for adults too. Nothing worse than the dude with bad B.O., or the drunk guy that won’t shut up, or the snoring lady with dragon breath.
Traveling with him may be tough now, but it will be worth it down the road. My kids are grown now. We traveled extensively with our son when he was an infant and to this day he has a passion for seeing the world. We subsequently traveled with our grandson and he to loves to go.
Thanks for the feedback Lee – it’s great to hear that traveling with your kids had a positive impact. We know it will get easier… we have actually returned from another trip since this experience and he was much better. Kids are just so hard to predict!
i would be travelling with my six months old baby on a long(more than 15 hours) journey.don’t know how it would be.i am breastfeeding.
I found it easier to travel with Baby B when I was breastfeeding. Anytime he got cranky, I just started feeding him. Calmed him down right away. Hope your trip goes well.
i always feel bad for parents with small children on flights…until they start crying.
Haha, that used to be us…now I just want to help 🙂
Awkward! It must be tough to be in public with a screaming child. Good that he’s been well behaved until now, I guess. And at least buying another seat seems to have solved the problem. I still throw tantrums on planes and I’m 30! 🙂
Haha, us too! Who really likes to be stuck on a plane for a long time. Not many people 🙂
I definitely heard that travelling with kids is better that no travelling at all. Because there are no bad places where to change pampers or such things. Just the one thing, that it’s a little bit harder to plan something. But it’s OK, really do recommend for everybody.
We agree. Although it was a tough flight, we still would rather be traveling than staying at home.
Hi Cam and Nicole, reading your post I was re-living our flight from Vancouver to Las Vegas with our 23 month old daughter. She didn’t have a seat and at times it was a nightmare. Another horrible journey was our flight from Vancouver to Amsterdam and Paris – she was 6 months old then and couldn’t sleep at all and she was screaming the whole time. I am happy to have found your nice blog and to see that there are other travellers with kids like us! Cheers!
Thanks Irene. We’ll we hope Connor is a good flier since B is very happy, provided he has his own seat. Vancouver, Amsterdam to Paris is a long way – hope you travel again even after that experience.
This article made me think about my future children and flying with them…
I think everyone goes through a bad experience at some point.
We will be travelling to Europe as a family of 5 plus a nanny. We have not bought a see for our 11 month old. Would you recommend it based on all of your previous experience? He will be 13 months old on the return.
When we traveled to Europe with our little one, he was 10 months old. We purchased a seat for him and used his car seat (that first photo was taken on that flight).
Overseas flights are taxing on everyone, so I would buy the extra seat and make it easier on everyone. That said, I don’t know your financial situation and what the cost will be, so you’ll need to factor that into the equation.
http://csftl.org/leaving-on-a-jet-plane-the-csftl-guide-to-safe-air-travel-with-children/
I think you should always buy a seat for your little one. 🙂
I would think so, given that you run a website about car seats. 😉
The big issue with the car seat on a plane is that you are required to purchase an additional seat, which is not always feasible. We understand the risks involved and use our car seat for long flights when we have purchased a separate seat. However, we’ve been told by airlines that we have to face the seat forward, so that it allows the passenger in front to recline their seat. It’s never as easy as it should be.
It would be nice if airlines discounted additional seats for families traveling with babies. This would encourage parents to purchase the extra seat, which would be safer for the little ones. But, alas, that’s not the way the world spins.
We are going on a long haul flight from London to Brazil with our little one who will be just short of two years.
Any advice on how to nab a free seat for him as it is too expensive to pay for one?
Or would you recommend just upgrading to get extra legroom seats so he has more space on the floor in front?
I’ve read that back seats are best but my concern is lack of space should a seat not be free.
Cheers
Just realised how I’ve just replied to a conversation that is years out and your kids will be a lot older now. How time goes fast.